We’re kind of living a dichotomy. These kids emotionally feel a part of our family and are legally part of our family BUT we can't physically be together like a family. They have what they need to leave their birth country, but they can't enter our home country until they have the necessary paperwork.
We've been networking and advocating within the system, only to be discouraged by the bureaucracy and by the way the kids are referred to as merely a "case." We fully expected to have no voice in the adoption process when working with the government of our kids' birth country. However, when we moved into the stage of dealing with our own government, we assumed we would have a voice... We were wrong to make that assumption and feel pretty disheartened.
(I will pause to say we recently met a woman who has shown more empathy and desire to help than anyone else we've encountered. We're truly appreciative of her and are hopeful she's the person who will be able to successfully advocate for our children!)
I've been spending a lot of time dwelling on this idea of having no voice... the perceived injustice of it... and I've been reminding myself that the one place where I DO have a voice, and always will, is with God. He hears me. He listens. He acts. It's difficult to remember that when I'm not seeing my big desire fulfilled in what I would consider a timely fashion... but it hit me today that I AM seeing God respond to many specific needs I voice to Him...
... The family that donated to our adoption fund multiple times this year, when we weren't proactively speaking of that need. When I thanked her, she said, "God told me that this was how I should encourage you."
... The neighbor that recently brought me an index card with a handwritten scripture because she prayed and felt like God led her to give me that message. And they were the exact words I needed to hear.
...The friend who saw me the other night and just said, "I see your heaviness" and gave me a hug. So small, but I was feeling invisible and walking through especially tough day.
These are just three tiny examples, but they are specifically meaningful to me because they came from people I don't see often, people who don't know the ins and outs of our daily trials. They didn't know I had voiced a need to God... and they didn't realize He was using them to meet those needs!
Please hold us in your prayers! We're approaching our son's birthday... days of significance, like birthdays, are especially difficult for all of us...
"Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying." - Romans 12:12
