The Flip Side

A theme in our house lately has been “choosing joy”. We’re trying to help our kids along the path of recognizing their thoughts, taking control of the negative ones and turning them around to something productive or positive… Chad's new teaching point of "only YOU can control your thoughts" rings in our house even after he's left for work each morning. :)

Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Philippians 4:8 (Message)

  

As it usually goes, when I try to emphasize a principle with the kids, I start to notice how often I don’t model my own teachings! For instance, am I choosing joyful thoughts as they relate to our adoption wait?

I've come to a place where it's not forefront in my mind on a day-to-day basis. I’ve accepted it, put it in the “it’s out of my control” part of my brain, and don’t dwell. I'm at peace with it each morning... BUT as some days progress it's brought to my attention a few too many times. 

Side note: On a drive last week, Asher spontaneously yelled from the backseat, “I can’t wait to meet my brother. I want it to be NOW! I am so tired of waiting that I’d be OK with meeting my sister first, as long as it could be NOW!” :)

Although in various forms, “when” is the most frequent question we are asked. How much longer til XYZ? When do you expect to know more? How long has it been since you started the process? When will they come home? What is taking so long?? 

I answer the questions and downcast feelings seep in.

So lately I’m trying to practice what I’m preaching to the kids... focusing on the flip side of what appears to be a depressingly long wait. Is there a positive?

Yes! 

I’m seeing it in Asher and Cora. They have had so much time to adjust to this concept that was originally foreign to them. We’ve never had to sit them down with a big awkward “announcement.” This is something that entered into our family’s language years ago and become part of our dialogue. Their questions are being answered, at their own pace when they think to ask them. Changes to their bedrooms, lifestyle, etc. are gradual. We’re not rushed in making preparations, so we have time to get their input and follow through on their ideas. Their hearts are growing and they’re becoming more and more interested in finding ways to love on and share with others. And probably most importantly, they’re getting to squeak out a little more undivided attention from Chad and I. :)

It warms my heart every time Asher
rips photos off of our fridge and
shows them to people saying,
“this is my brother/sister!”

And it amuses me to no end that
Cora has informed every cashier
in the Midlothian area that
we are buying things for her
sister who lives in Africa.