Opportunity

I’ve been reflecting on that job opportunity that I walked away from earlier this month (need an update? Read this!)… and that word, OPPORTUNITY, is just hanging with me. What a blessing to have opportunities! Whether you ignore them, accept them, turn them down… We are blessed to have opportunity!

We have the opportunity to…

Choose what we want for dinner… to even have dinner!

Enroll in a public school...

Speak freely…

Dress in a style of our own choosing...

Come and go as we please…

Choose and communicate what we believe without fear…

Seek medical care…

Turn on the faucet and drink water…

Dream about what we want to do when we grow up – whatever that may be…

Grow families without government constraints…

Play sports, be creative, follow dreams…

Seriously, I could just spend the afternoon adding to this list. The opportunities are countless for us… in large part because we were born free in a country that values our freedom and opportunity.

As I have been sitting on this word, I keep thinking of the sweet children waiting for homes… many of whom are “older” or have “special needs” that may limit even their opportunity to be adopted. My heart just breaks for them...  and seriously, while in the middle of writing this post, someone sent me a link to the video below. WATCH IT. I am so moved...

I Like Adoption: Video

The Dennehy's decide to give the gift of 'family' to nine children from around the world....

Tug of Heart

No real news to share. But here’s the thing: the waiting isn’t bothering me. I think it’s bothering all of you more than me – because you all look so disappointed when you ask for an adoption update and there’s not one to give. :)

That’s not to say it’s not disappointing to see our number stay the same for a few months in a row. (If you're thinking to yourself, “what number?", click here.) It is disappointing! A decreasing number would be a visual reminder that things are moving along in the process… but so far the wait isn’t hanging over us and weighing on me like I had anticipated.

And here’s the reason why: God in continually laying things on our hearts regarding this adoption. Many of the things are just small thoughts here or there. But it’s enough to get us thinking, get us praying, and taking action… maybe it’s a bit of research… maybe it’s a lesson to teach our kids…maybe it’s supporting other orphan-care movements… no matter how big or small each individual action is, I know it’s all in preparation for what’s to come. And it fulfills a PURPOSE in the PRESENT. So as we listen and follow the tugs on our heart, we are finding meaningful ways to fill the wait...

God, the one and only— I’ll wait as long as he says. Everything I hope for comes from him, so why not?  Psalm 62:5 (Message)

One "purpose for the present" is teaching Asher & Cora
about sharing with others... They are getting it!

Another "purpose for the present" is fundraising...
Thank you to everyone participating in my monthly crafting workshops!!!

In You...

Just a quick note of gratitude to everyone who has indicated an interest in supporting us financially during the adoption. We truly appreciate you!

We are continually being asked the amount for our fundraising target…  We haven’t intentionally been vague! See my last blog and add finances to the “learning curve” list! :)

The honest answer is (1) we are uncomfortable focusing on the money and (2) we don’t know for sure how much we will need… BECAUSE in our dossier, we indicated an interest in a sibling set. So we could be referred one OR two children… meaning the fees could be double for two kids!

So, our initial goal is to raise $8,500. If the referral comes back for two children, we may kick into higher gear with raising support… only time will tell. We continue to trust that God has it all figured out already. He wouldn’t put us on this path without the funding being out there!

... for in you the fatherless find compassion. Hosea 14:3

If you do decide to donate, (THANK YOU!), please make checks payable to “Lifesong for Orphans". In the memo, note BLALOCK #4230 to assure it goes to the correct account. Please mail to Lifesong for Orphans, PO Box 40, Gridley, IL  61744.  Lifesong has been blessed with a partner that underwrites all U.S. administrative and fund-raising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to the adoption.  

Another option is to give online. Go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate. Select “Give to an Adoptive Family.” Complete the online form and fill in:

“Family Account Number” 4230

“Family Name” BLALOCK 

More information on our fundraising and arrangement with Lifesong can be found here.

Learning Curve

We are continuing to learn SO much as we move forward in the adoption process…

• Learning statistics about need, disease and poverty.

• Realizing social injustice is real and not comprised of clear-cut black and white issues/solutions.

• Discovering that we have held our own misconceptions and biases.

• Gathering information about parenting orphaned children and addressing their special needs.

• Learning that their needs are deep and wide - emotional, spiritual, physical, medical, social, etc. (As we speak, I am signed up for a class called Braids, Curls, Twists and Twirls : A How-To for Natural Black Hair Care – because my sweet children will need to look presentable! :))
  

Perhaps I should start with a simple style...
and not this adorable heart braid!

And in addition to processing all of this external information, I am examining myself. Because I have a lot to work on!

I’m a “doer”. I don’t like to talk about things for long… I don’t want to chit-chat while we could be taking action. I want to come up with a few possible solutions and then pick one. Jump in. ACT. DO something about it!

That complicates this whole adoption process… because you are constantly bombarded with information that is not actionable! One day there’s a rumor that adoption laws may change… Another day you find out your paperwork is delayed… Then you read someone’s adoption horror story… then you read a truly positive and inspirational story… Then you get information on a specific child outside of your homestudy parameters… Then you read about parenting techniques, but you don’t have an adopted child yet to parent!... Then another article surfaces about more changes in the process… etc. etc.  

So, I’m addressing my do-er tendencies and understanding that within this process (and really all of life), I've got to truly dig deep and rely on the Lord… Many times no other action is necessary other than prayer. He’ll fight our battles for us. He’ll work things out for the good of those who love him…. So frustrating to feel paralyzed sometimes, but SO TRUE!

We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

Another piece of my self-discovery? I’m transparent. I don’t want to hide whatever I’m going through. I want to be open about it - real – sincere - genuine. I want to share what I am learning. I want to talk it through with people and know that I have their support.

This is also an area of complication for me in the adoption journey… because my future kids may NOT be comfortable with transparency. They will be joining our family without a say… and at an age where they do not yet fully know their own story. Being a part of our family will hopefully be a positive part of their story, but joining our family is not the beginning OR end of their story… and one day it will be THEIR choice to share or not share… Because they may have something heavy to reconcile. They may not want to be labeled or judged for something. They may not be ready to own every piece of their history.

So as we move forward, I’m starting to check myself. To make sure I’m not sharing what is not mine to share… boundaries will need to be set. Information made for our family only. It’s a balance that I am learning… and ask that you respect the boundaries if a time comes when we “clam up.” 

Oh… there is so much more learning to be done… would love to hear what you are learning in your stage of life, as well!